There's enough... I’m enough
Once you start working on yourself and paying attention to your thoughts, habits and where your consciousness is, you are open to finding some really interesting things. A huge one for me was, what I call the ‘me and them mindset’
During a discussion about a friend of a friend who had become wildly successful and was busy achieving great things in his business I caught a glimpse of a very quick, almost fleeting shadow of a thought. “He’s one of those people who can have that, that’s not for me” WOW!!! I knew in that moment that I would have to go in and find it. I didn’t really want to because as I examined that thought I had to acknowledge how familiar it was to me. That means it’s old, and it means that it will be work.
In meditation that night I went back to that moment and summoned that feeling. Here’s what I found: I had a real and convincing belief that I was not worthy of success or great things or achievements in general. Somewhere in my childhood I had given up on the idea in an attempt to protect myself. This is honestly one of the saddest things I have ever had to face. I don't know exactly when it happened - it doesn't really matter- I do know that I have been governed by it for years. Sabotaging my own efforts and betraying spirit even while saying ''the right things'' and doing ''the work''. F*$k!! As I comforted that wounded child, I just cried in frustration with, and sympathy for, myself. It was hard.
I often hear and read about the law of attraction. I had been putting out lack and mediocrity and the universe had answered - as it does- with exactly what I was asking for. F#$k!
It's still something I have to keep in check, but at least I can talk about it more in the past tense. So how did I reach this point? As you already know, not alone.
A very big influence in this new way of thinking and attracting - Jason Wolverson. (exceedingly wise and inspiring spiritual healer) I have seen Jason a couple of times and he really is phenomenal at what he does but interestingly, one of the the biggest things I learnt from him (possibly unbeknownst to him) was derived from his bio...
It reads as follows: MBA, Stud DC Med, VC Pegasus, CEO Brevinox, Healer, Proud Daddy, Jason Wolverson App, Heal for business, Turnaround Specialist. I mean, really!!!! Now the old version of me would have read this from an insecure space of mediocrity and in an attempt to make myself feel better, I would have rolled my eyes and thought ''over-achiever''🙄 But, I read it as a work in progress so the phrase that comes to mind is ''fullest potential realiser'' (Yes I made that up, it's perfect!)👌🏼
That is what I am chasing!!! Some seemingly simple but profound things Jason has said to me "Get out of your head", "I want you to own it'', ''You could change the world". These spoke directly to my inner saboteur and I have evolved with a new set of beliefs. I am worthy and I can have EVERYTHING I want!!!! There's enough for everybody!!!! As I've said, I have no idea where I'll end up, but I have to be able to look back and see that I tried, that I chased.
☎️ Jason Wolverson: +27 72 294 9195 speak to the lovely Mel for appointments.
From Jerico Mandybury's The Daily Oracle