The first time I ever sat across from a psychic he said that I should do a regression. At that stage, I was so closed and young, my response was "Why? I see no value in looking back." I will never forget the way he looked at me. OMG cringe!!! 🤦🏻♀️ Haa haaa. Now, eight years later I see that all the answers I have found, had their roots in the past.
Right so, past life regressions. Yes, it is a form of therapy, and it has many a benefit to the hungry seekers of the world. That said, if you google it there are as many arguments for as there are against it. So, I'm not going to tell anyone what to do. As always, I will take you through my long and involved journey. It is a mass of information but the new moon in Aries has -as promised- brought the energy I needed to get into it.
Disclaimer: This blog is beautiful, and it makes my heart smile, but it is not a mechanism for hurt. So no, you will not get all the 'gories.' Do not fret though, it’s still fabulous, and profound and hysterical! Get comfy - its long.
As I drive to the man that I randomly found on Google, I contemplate that he could actually be a serial killer. I have not done my homework.😬 Still, it felt right when booking. Just to be safe I check in with my guides and remind them that there is soooo much I still have to do. I arrive and Neels Viljoen of Healing Light greets me warmly and explains the process to follow. Not a serial killer. I'm excited. Although I have tried many things, I never got around to a regression.
No stranger to the depths within I drift off easily. As Neels guides me through I fall from the universe and land (Like Spiderman) one hand on the ground to stablise me. I'm a man, wearing sandals in what looks like ancient Rome. The ground is arid and cracked and as I navigate the narrow streets, I realise that I am hot!!! OMG. And Buff. Before I know it, I'm doing a 'swagger walk' in my Grecian robes. My, oh my! 🔥🔥 Ask anyone who knows me, if I see man sporting this swagger, I roll my eyes and ask if he could be any more vain. But after this short saunter down wherever TF this is, I'm not sure that they can help it, it feels so natural and so neccessary! Haaaa Haaaaaaa!!!!! 😂 Could I be more vain? I look down and realise that I can't see over my pecks. Just as I am about to fully explore my new (or old) avatar - Ezekiel. ''Focus.'' Spoil sport. 🙄 ''Why are you here?'' I tell him I'm looking for a wife. ‘’Good, he confirms.’’ But I can’t find one. ''Why not?'' I don't know - something is not right. He tells me that this is where my trust issues started. He says everyone betrays me. I look at the 'dishy me' and feel it. Hurt, betrayal, despair, the need to scream my sadness into sky. I console him, tell him that we are going to be ok. Ezekiel says, "now (meaning my current life) you betray yourself." Never truer words were spoken. They were heavy and difficult to hear. Eventually the whole city crumbles and as I look to Ezekiel for clarity I hear Neels directing me to the most significant instance of this betrayal... I find myself in a cabin.
I have no idea when this is. I am a little girl. I recognise myself because it seems I have maintained the same mop of black hair over many lifetimes. There is a man behind me. A relative. While I'm staring and trying to piece this all together - He kills me. WTF!!! Seems excessive. Ezekiel is calm and collected. So, I follow his lead. Obviously my first question is: Who is he? I look up to see his face and Ezekiel waves him away like smoke. ''It's not important. What do you feel?'' Yip, you guessed it. Betrayal, hurt, shock, sadness. I reach for the little girl. Desperate to hug her, but her soul stops me and says, ''I'm fine, it was always going to end this way. Concentrate on you.'' Hmmmmm, ok. At first I thought, at least one version of me has her shit together. But now I realise that she and I are the same. Absolutely fine - AFTER JUST BEING MURDERED. Fml. She clearly trusts me to heal us. I tell Neels that this memory is over.
His next instructions are for me to go to the next big betrayal in my life. I close my metaphysical eyes and see myself falling through lives. It looks like I'm falling through a series of 'me shaped' ghosts. I’m in a cottage. I’ve been here before, in many a dream and meditation. I’m a witch/medicine woman, I sense that people are afraid of coming to my house. I feel something around my waist. When I look down, I see a man on his knees, face buried in my stomach, crying. I’m so confused. When I look at him again, I receive a rush of information. We are together, a couple. As he sobs he is begging my forgiveness. In that moment I know without doubt that ‘they’ are coming for me. He (my partner) has turned me over. Still staring at him I realise that although he loves me, he will always need validation and acceptance from ‘the many’, that is who he is or that is his lesson. That version of me knew it already, I wanted to help him. Unfortunately it was him who had to help him. It didn't matter what I did or how much I loved him. Ezekiel: "Do you see the pattern?" I start to cry. Neels now tells me to look into the man's eyes for they are the windows to the soul and see if he is present in my current life. I did as I was told. At first I notice something strange, then with divine clarity a photograph of someone in this life floats across my mind. I know these eyes. I know this soul! I know it even today. And with that realisation so many questions are answered and so much makes sense. It was profound. Leaving this scene for the next significant life I feel a sense of gratitude.
As I arrive in the next stop of this adventure my senses are flooded with hints of familiarity. The scent of flora, the air is close and the soft comfort of moss under my feet. In Horror Movies Within I wrote about my wolf. The great love of (one of my earliest) lives. After the tongue lashing I gave him in Past Lives and the ties that Bind I don't see him too much, but here he was. As I see him I get a bit giddy. Like a school girl. Me, as I am currently - I roll my eyes and think OMG, get it together- but me then, wow she revels in it, opens up and surrenders to it, She is ridiculously in love. Like Pride and Prejudice in love. Although I think her (me) silly, there is a tiny part of me that envies her. She knows a level of freedom that I have yet to meet. Anyway, I digress. He meets me and we walk together, we don't say anything, but we don't have to. After what felt like an hour I am reminded that he was murdered. I see myself on my knees screaming in devastation. Not the best thing to witness but the new development is that I was not murdered after him as I thought. I killed myself so I wouldn't have to live without him. Wow. Neels asks for my dying thoughts and all I say is that I feel joy because it's over and I can go find him. In hind sight, it wasn't the best plan, also in Past Lives and the Ties That Bind I wrote that I am still looking for him. Meh - Fail. Neels guides me further back. I glide like Dracula 🧛🏻♀️ backwards over the ground and soon feel rock against my back. It's cold.
I look at Ezekiel. ''You don't have to go there.'' As he says it, he grins. He knows me. I'm pushing the rock as hard as I can. Eventually it gives way all I see is light. Neels tells me to dim the light, easier said than done I think, but soon enough the light rescinds and I'm in a cave. I look back at Ezekiel and say, really? A cave woman? He's laughing now. "Just watch." So obviously because I've not seen anything yet, the mind fills the space with our conscious pre-conceived ideas about the time we are in. When I look down I realise that I am in a Flintstone dress. Whaaaaaaa Haaaaaaa! How corny!!!! " Unimpressed, I mutter “WTF Stacey." Looking for anything I pivot and see a man. His bare chest puffed out and the look on his face, cold and determined. He’s pointing to the exit of the cave. Kicking me out. I have no idea what I did. (Probably too sassy) but I have to go. As I leave I choose to roll with a favourite vibration of mine. I'm saying things like It’s fine, I don’t need you. I’ll make it on my own. Ezekiel is giving me that look. Yeeessss, I hiss. I see it. The stubborn hyper independence. Both me and my pride were probably devoured by sabretooth tiger five steps later, but still. I showed no fear, I pretended to be A-ok. I'm badly dressed and soooo annoying - this memory is too much. I drift out of it.
It seems the cave saga was the last screening on offer. What a roller coaster of lives and emotions and epiphanies!!!! I'm quite tired at this point. Neels asks to speak directly to my guide. Ezekiel was dead pleased!!! He came through with a new boyish mischievousness that I've never seen before. It was difficult not to laugh. He literally had the time of his afterlife! I can’t go through it all, there was so much, but at one point he looked at me and said, "ha haaa, he's not used to this at all. He's quite intimidated." I just looked at him. "Tell him!" he ordered. I told Neels that he says there's something unusual about this for him. Neels confirmed that the session had taken quite different turn, not what he had expected. He went on to ask some questions, here they are with their answers.
1.What does Stacey need to do to release these emotions?
The answer came in pictures and was really difficult to explain, but the crux of it was this: I struggle because although I am creative, I am also analytical. So even though I am open to the messages from various sources, I still doubt and question and analyse. I'm trying to reconcile the science or the physical with the 'woo woo' or metaphysical. I cause chaos and confusion for myself.
2. What else does she need to know?
Speaking directly to me he says "you are guided child and anything you want you will move towards. You have soooo much faith but little trust." I have to trust the messages and move accordingly. He gives me an image of a person bunny hopping. He says "If you do that, you will have to come back again. You have to go through."
3. Spiritually is she on the right path?
"Oh please, she sees the path, she knows it. She starts the path - she never finishes it." She doesn't listen! 🙄 Rude - but true.
To close, I have to say that this was an incredible session. I pieced together and understood more and more after the session and continue to do so, I would certainly recommend it, if you vibe with the idea. Do I doubt some of it, of course! The mind will always try to worm its way back in and de-bunk. Still, I have given it so much thought. Here is my humble opinion.
Could all of it be a giant construct of my imagination? Possibly. I don't believe that but let‘s play devil's advocate. If you dare to try, you‘ll see that there are things you will doubt and things that you will simply know to be true. For me, there were answers and insight in both. I need to know the source of things so that I can fully understand, heal and adapt. I can use the answers to see things and live differently. Better. If my imagination is going to gift me nonsense that improves my life and makes me happy then why TF not! I'll take it...
Big thanks to Neels Viljoen. 😊