I have just been handled...
Listen, I have had the best bloody time choosing me. I still choose me, I am still working hard on me but this weekend came with a epiphanies and revelations...
I have to pull back from negative people and I have to avoid drama. The more I open up the more imperative it becomes. Lately, I have noticed that I am almost repelled by people who cant move out of negativity. My whole physical and spiritual being is frustrated and uncomfortable until I am clear of the vibe. With such loud indications of the clingy pessimism I find it easier to remove myself....for that I make no apologies. 💚💚
So what revelations are making themselves apparent? After writing F?%* This, I'm Out. I felt pretty good and I stand by what I wrote. Be who you say you are. I struggle with inauthentic people - that will never change. I also wrote a great deal about me storing things in my solar plexus. (Also so, so true) but after an incredible session with Janet Sutherland I have been ''B%*ch slapped'' with new perspective and harsh clarity.
Janet and I sat down and began with the cards. There were a few, but the one that issued my scolding was the reversed 5 of wands. Janet with intrigue ''Hmmm, Stace, who are you fighting but ''not fighting with''? Ha ha, straight to the point then. 😂 As she asked I knew irrevocably that this was the reason I had come to Janet on this day, it was for this card, this message, this lesson. I told her what was weighing on my heart. She listened intently and with a presence as fierce as my own she proceeded to handle me.... (as you can imagine, its not my favourite thing- I like to be the handler)
As I went on and on she, on three different occasions, in different tones, patiently paraphrased the recurring theme. ''Who's is that?'' ''Was that done to you?'' ''Is that your battle?'' ''Why are you picking this up?'' F@%$ she was soooooooo right!
Here I am, announcing to the world (albeit my tiny blog-world) that I will not be blindly loyal, I will not let drama into my space! Look at me, soooo ''together''. In truth I am loyally picking up the crap of others and in my quest to declare that something is NOT OK I am allowing it to drive. 🤦🏽♀️
I have to surrender. Also, not my favourite thing, but it is the truth. I cannot expect others to treat me as I treat them. They are looking through a lens clouded by their own upbringings, scratched by their own issues and fogged by their own boundaries. Those are not my glasses. 👓
Lovely: what does this all mean??????? It means that I will have accept that some people make no sense to me. I will have to accept that they will not change. They will not see things as I do nor treat me as I treat them because they are not wearing my glasses. For the first time in my life I will have to wholeheartedly believe that ''it is what it is'' ''they are who they are'' it is not my job to change it. It is my job to respect it.
As I sit here, I see that it was not others who assaulted my solar plexus with their baggage. It was me. Even though I disguised it as disdain or ''the right thing'' it was me allowing their baggage in to be stored and stewed. Handing out my power like chappies at a cafe. 🙄
How profound? From today I protect myself and my vibes, inspire or cheer up where I can, en devour to change only myself and be who I say I am. There is literally nothing else I can do.
With that I smile a big smile, order another coffee and breathe the free air. 🙏🏽
📢 LIKE FREE STUFF??? I know I always sing Janet's praises....she deserves them. SOOOO, I am 'gifting' away a session with Janet. She can do online for those who are not in JHB. Please share the RoadtoSpirit link with people who you feel would benefit or enjoy it. If they subscribe please ask them to reference you in a message or email and I will put you both into the draw on the 1st of May!!!